Disclaimer: No (additional) harm was done to my child for the making of this post! The stitches and fat lip she gave herself - the black eye was a makeup trick by momma for some added drama.
Things have been a bit of a blur since I left the ER last night in a Benedryl-induced haze.
What's that?? You hadn't heard? I had a pretty serious run-in with our end table last night. I wasn't down for the count, though! Then I took on a round with boredom in the waiting room, a nurse giving me numbing meds, and the whole staff present when I got 9 stitches. I didn't exactly come out on top, but Mom says I'm a real champ anyway!
I'm not the biggest or strongest kid out there, but I'm determined to put up a better fight next time. Here's my plan to defeat my every nemesis, be it stationary furniture or a more sinister beast!
Step 1: Show off those battle scars!
They'll never know what size opponent you took on to get 'em. All they know is you're a real Bad Tooshie!
Step 2: Work on that War Face!
I get all kinds of practice making this face for the unsuspecting passer-by. You never know when you'll have to be ready to do battle. While you're at it, perfect a growl too.
Step 3: Totally Lose It.
Never underestimate the fear a CRAZY PERSON can strike in the heart of your opponent!
That's my strategy! Good luck my friends :)